Clenching the fists brings in tension to the neck, shoulders, arms, hands and back.  Put your hands into fists now and tighten them and see where you can feel it in your body.

Times when people might tense their hands are when they are anxious, stressed or angry but this can also happen when we are sleeping.  Gripping things too tightly, such as toothbrushes and pens add to this tightness.  It’s a habit to look out for.

If you notice you’re tightening the hands, just allow them to soften and open out.  See if this helps you feel more relaxed in other areas of your body.

It’s easier to tackle when you’re awake but not impossible when you’re asleep.  During the half awake moments in the night, you can see if your hands are clenched as well as when you first wake up.  Bit by bit this habit can change and sleeping can get more comfortable.

I work quite a lot with hand, arm and shoulder tension in my Alexander Technique lessons as it can be quite hard to undo for oneself.

Following on from my blog on work life balance, a nurse has put things in true perspective.  Bronnie Ware spent several years caring for patients in the last 12 weeks of their lives.  Through discussions, she noted their regrets in a blog called Inspiration and Chai and has since written a book on how her life has been transformed by the wisdom of these observations.  There were five common themes:

1.  I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
“This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.”

2.  I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”

3.  I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings

“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”

4.  I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends

“Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”

5.  I wish that I had let myself be happier

“This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”

There’s no one best sleeping position as it’s an individual thing but there are things that can help.

The height of the pillow makes a difference.  You need to find a height where your neck is in neutral.  Your neck needs to be aligned with your spine rather than bent down or up.

If you sleep on your back, you many need a different height pillow than if you sleep on your side or front.  Let’s see some ideas for each position:

Sleeping on your back

Have the pillow height so your neck  is comfortably aligned.  If the pillow is too low, your chin will poke up in the air and the back of your neck will be shortened.  If the pillow is too high, your  throat may be constricted and your neck may be pushed up.

Some people like their neck to be supported but others prefer just their head on the pillow.  See what works best for you.

Experiment with a pillow under your knees and see what effect this has on your lower back pain.

Sleeping on your side

Find a pillow height so the neck is in neutral.  It’s not advisable to tuck the chin into the body, as this can cause neck strain.

Try a pillow between your knees.  This opens the hips up and doesn’t pull on the back so much.

If you have a longer pillow or a V-shaped pillow, you could also have one end of the pillow between your ankles.

If your arms feel bunched, hug a pillow (or a person!) to open up more in the chest.

Lying on your front

Depending on your body, you may not need a pillow at all – experiment to see how the pillow affects your neck.

Sleeping on your front can cause back strain for some.  If it causes low back pain but is the only way you can sleep, try putting a slim pillow under your pelvis and/or lower abdomen.

Pillows

Pillows are a personal choice and it is hard to gauge the pillow’s height as they sink and move under the head weight.  Some shops have beds that you can lie on to test out pillows so this can help avoid an expensive mistake.

It’s likely that pillows between the knees end up on the floor by the morning!  You can buy smaller pillows that are a bit easier to manage, especially when you turn over.  These are sometimes called “boudoir pillows” and are ones for looking pretty on the bed but they are quite useful.

Happy New Year! One idea for a new year’s resolution is to have a good work-life balance.  Even when not in the workplace, we can still tend to focus on other types of work, such as chores…. or procrastinating on a to do list.

A good balance is the key to physical and mental well being.  Balance can also be changing our routines and habits and discovering new things.

Last week, I roamed about the Victoria and Albert museum in a random manner and discovered the wonderful jewellery collection as well as design and furniture galleries.

And here is something I’ve been knitting: a kick boxing outfit for a toy monkey.  Great concentration for my brain and a creative outlet.

Having found out where the head balances on top of the neck, what next?

Our heads are very heavy – the equivalent weight of 4 to 5 litres of water.  With this heavy weight on top of the body, it needs to work with us and not against us.

If the head hangs down, it pulls on the neck and back.  If  we tilt our head back it’s also a strain on the neck, back and shoulders.  Pushing our head forward to look at the computer screen also strains the neck and back.

So we want to find a natural balance point that takes the stress and tension away from the body.

We need to free the neck first.  This is just a thought rather than something to do. Allow the muscles to undo tension in the neck and to not clamp or fix onto the head.  Soften the jaw. And then allow the head to slightly nod forward from the balance point between the ears.  Then think to free the neck again.

The head neck balance wants to be free, not fixed in one position.  So we need to keep reminding the head and neck of their optimal balance as existing habits will creep back very quickly.

There is quite a bit more to this than meets the eye and this is easy to mistranslate.  It really needs the skilled guidance of an Alexander Technique teacher’s hands to help.  If you’d like more insight, you can come along for a one to one lesson or to one of my group classes.

To find where the head balances on the neck, place a finger in the soft dent behind each ear lobe.  Imagine a line going between these 2 points.  The middle of this line is approximately where the head balances on the neck.

It’s often higher than people imagine it to be.

The head neck joint (or atlanto occipital joint) is a crucial balance point for the whole body.

I’ll explain more about this in my next blog posting so keep an eye out for this.

If you can’t wait that long, then why not book an introductory lesson so that I can show you how to free your neck and let your head balance.

Neck pain is the second most common health problem in the UK, after back pain. In a national survey, 18 per cent of people said they currently had neck pain, with over half still in pain 1 year later. Furthermore, chronic (long-term) neck pain has been estimated to account for 1% of total UK healthcare costs.

The £719,000 clinical trial is being funded by Arthritis Research UK. The trial will compare the effectiveness of Alexander Technique lessons for chronic neck pain with usual GP care. In parallel, the trial will also look at the effectiveness of acupuncture compared with usual GP care. Like Alexander Technique lessons, acupuncture is known to be effective for chronic back pain, and both have been shown to be cost-effective for this condition, so there is good reason for including these two interventions in the new trial.

Watching commuters and city workers, everyone seems in such a hurry.  People are so tense.  They walk stiffly, frowning.  Many are plugged into headphones, disconnected from what’s around them.

Some ideas:

• Look around and see your surroundings.  Pretend you’re on holiday in a new environment and notice the architecture, views and other people.

• Remember to breathe.

• Be aware you have a body.  Try to untighten the back and neck muscles and allow your body to feel less tense.

Life is more than being in a hurry.  We can be more than “heads on sticks”.  More than thinking brains moving from one place to the next.  We can be alive and aware of our bodies, minds and the environment around us.

It’s mindfulness.

Chair seat too low? Yellow Pages can raise the seat height so your forearms are parallel to the table when typing, reading or eating.  A whole pile of Yellow Pages is great for kids who can then eat and write more comfortably.

Legs too short? If your feet can’t sit flat on the floor comfortably, try resting them on the Yellow Pages.  Your legs can then relax more and it’s more comfortable for the back.

Uncomfortable sitting on the floor? Try sitting on a Yellow Pages.  More comfortable to be upright on your sitting bones without slouching your pelvis back.  Great for meditating or when playing with the kids.

Even better, it saves landfill.  How green.

Many of us put a lot of stress and pressure on ourselves and rush about.  It’s not always productive.  Have you rushed out of the house only to have to return to check if you’ve locked the front door?  Or forgotten something?  Or to double check you’ve not left the iron on?

A good phrase to try out is: “I have time”